2 Inches Of Fury

Something Worth Reading.

RIMjob

When I see RIM, the first thing I think about is rimjob.
Some people think of Research in Motion.
If that was your first thought, you sir are a freak.

Blackberry are soon to release their new OS: OS6. It offers nothing new that other phones have already successfully done with few issues. People are comparing which is the very first thing people want to do. The advertising even looks like something that could have been produced by Apple. But making comparisons would be like comparing apples and oranges. Yes, Blackberry has a general consumer market but their audience target is geared towards businesses. What you are comparing are typical-consumer-end-user and business user which is wrong.

One of the great things about Blackberry though is use of a BES. No other device has anything like it. You have the ability to group users, create policies which allow multiple applications to a Blackberry and remove other applications if need be. Controlling it from a central point. From an administration point of view, it is great to have such a tool. I mean, there is room for errors yes but the BES seems to pretty stable.

Blackberry 6 New Browser
Even this looks pretty standard. It is like upgrading from IE6 to IE7.

Here is the latest preview:

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Graham’s Number

I need some clarification from people who are smarter than I am.
This is an explanation of Graham’s Number.
Does of it actually make sense to people?
Or is this just bullshit?
Why 63 steps?

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Movie Idea Gets the 2 Inch Workover

So I was viewing of Drunk.Sex.Orgy.All.Night.Love.Lounge.2008 last night and then came up with this idea of a romantic porn-comedy. We are introduced to a guy who makes this one rule: he never fucks on the first date and he is an uptight dude. Like our protagonist in 40 year old virgin. So he is not into chicks who fuck on first dates, either.
His friends sign up for an All Night Love Lounge. Comedy ensues.
He is surrounded by people fucking. And he couldn’t feel more out of place if he was a black man at a KKK meeting. He’s not a virgin but he is more uptight about sex than a room full of Christians.
He suddenly realises that looking at all these people fucking is making him hard. And he likes it.
He glances around the room and catches the eye of some bird who seems extremely wild but she is into him. Ya know, just for a quickie. Or is it? BLAMMO! We find them screwing each other so hard, his dick becomes a stub. They both felt something besides an orgasm but the dude is really adamant about his no interest in a chick who fucks on first dates. After they finish up, they go their separate ways. There is over-done cum shots in the background of guys blowing litres of women in the style of mentos in coke bottles.
His friends see him on a porno: Drunk.Sex.Orgy.All.Night.Love.Lounge.2008 and they are impressed. Then the movie turns into a guy who is trying to track down a chick he fucked at an organised orgy. There is a flash-forward dream sequence where he is toasting at his wedding and he says something like, “Most people say that relationships never work out if she fucks on the first date. I don’t know if you would consider the orgy I met my wife in a first date…”
He finds her eventually. They meet in a library and she jokes that she is a librarian. Then they have surprise buttsecks in the library toilet. Never at any point do we question if she is smart or not. I haven’t decided whether the joke would benefit from this crazy bitch to be smart or dumb as dogshit. I think the crazy would heavily outweigh any question into this.
They start going out. He finds out that not only she fucking out of control but also a complete nymph but we all saw that coming. I am not yet sure but she might have one of those rare conditions where she needs to be in a constant state of euphoria by sex or she dies.
They go out for awhile through a montage. I will have Stephen Lynch write a song in his usual fashion that comes across to begin with as sweet and innocent before belting out into something fucked up.
They get married. One day he comes home early. He finds in their bed with her Rick Moranis, Gilbert Gottfied or someone else who you would least suspect.
Yes, this guy:
gilbertg.jpg
Keep in mind while searching for this photo, I Googled unsexy men of all time and found in that list Justin Beiber. I am sure the millions of screaming girls who have emotional breakdowns the moment he walks in the room and would be more than happy to ride his cock (ya know, if he wasn’t gay) would tend to disagree with that list. And Tiger Woods is in that same list. The man who banged 17 women while he was married (probably came home to bang his wife too). I am sure the number would have been higher than that if he was given the chance.

So they break up. And there is your typical montage of him feeling depressed walking down streets with a song that starts out with an acoustic guitar and then descends into death metal playing over the top. Ya know, to really fit the mood.
And that is the end of the movie.
Because love is a tool. And break ups are apart of life. And I fucking hate RomCom’s that finish on a positive note.
But before we end the movie, two things happen. We find out the chick ends up with syphillus and dies. We meet the same friends we saw at the start of the film. And to cheer him up from the break up, they signed him up.
To an All Night Love Lounge.
Ya know, for a possible sequel.

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India Olympic Games 2010

We are trusting India with our hopes and dreams for acheiving gold this year.
But, the only thing I would trust with those guys is giving us is a case of the trots with whatever goulash they muster up and perhaps piss poor after-market service with second rate English.

The bridge between the stadium and the main road had collapsed recently.
The roof of the stadium collapsed on the 23/9. Would this be key indicators that India are not fit to host the Olympic games? You know, I think the only thing less dodgy than a stadium and nearby construction which falls apart before the event is perhaps the traffic on the streets and the cab drivers which charge 5000 rupees to get you there.

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Piracy Cops 2 Inches

I love piracy.
Not because the end result is otherwise paid movies, music, apps and porn for free but the idea that we, the little people, can flip the metaphoric bird to the same companies that have the nerve to charge us $30 a CD ($15-20 on special) for the manufactured shit they produce.
My thought would be that it would force companies into opening up markets that weren’t there 10 years ago and being forced to make better movies and TV shows. All it ended up doing is allowing people to download the same shit they would normally pay for, for free. And people still go to the movies or buy CDs. So this whole piracy revolution is not as bad as the companies lead us to believe.
What DID change is the same DVD I would have to pay MORE for because it’s a foreign/art house/ANYTHING non-mainstream release, made it both cheaper for me to buy online or download it for free if I can actually find it. Woo.

So, where I am going with this typical rant you expect from me is a U.S. Copyright Group caught stealing competitor’s code with their website. And it is not a little bit here, a little bit there. I mean it’s the same fucking web page with one or two minor changes.
On a similar note, uTorrent (a popular torrenting client), has released an alpha release of uTorrent 3. Normally I don’t give a shit about what the latest version of Winzip or whatever has to offer but this is a little different.
The idea being you set a username and password then you can remote in anywhere in the world and control your torrents remotely. Sounds awesome but my main problem is security and trust. The internet is like the worst fucking girlfriend you’ve ever had and would NEVER trust. Little tip: Those are not freckles on her arse. Use a condom.
So being skeptical means I would like to see it in action and it certainly would make having to either SSL or VNC to my machine at home to check how my torrents are progressing seem a little redundant.

Ya know how I said before I don’t condone piracy?
Well, go ahead. Download everything.
I don’t give a shit.
No one visits my site anyway.

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Fuck Microsoft. :)



The trolling clowns at MS have done it.
They have made a video for the uninitiated to scare OpenOffice.org(OOo) users into moving to Office. I didn’t realise it was such a threat so something must be a rumble in the Oracle (since they bought out Sun who developed OpenOffice) jungle. The main complaint I get as a site technician is people hate the “new” look (AKA Ribbon) for MS office package. I don’t like it, either but that opinion is a really a moot point as I have to learn where everything is for my job. One of the primary arguments for the new look was everything was in a more logical area. What would have been even more logical is if you left the fucking thing alone. People knew where shit was. Just MS riding the unneccessary money train to the bank. Giving users the reason to upgrade even though 2003 was more than suitable. People can argue until they’re black and blue in the face that the ribbon was a good idea and was needed but it just comes off as a power control move to say they can make completely different changes to their Office package and people will still flock and buy it.
I found Office to run slower than a sack of shit in Windows XP. It was only until recently Windows 7 do we see any substancial improvement in the program’s boot time. How about getting the fundamentals right instead of trying to bullshit the public with unneccesary GUI (Graphical User Interface) upgrades?
Apart from Macro support, this video does not have a leg to stand on.
The other complaint in the video is piss poor support with its own product. Here is a thought: Maybe that might have more to do with Microsoft’s proprietary formatting than with OpenOffice? Of course Office is going to have better support. It is its own file format. If you are trying to compete with a popular piece of software that has its own format that no other piece of software uses natively, then you are going to try your damn hardest to ensure that the format will work. If the popular piece of software does not cooperate (and it wouldn’t be in Microsofts financial interests), what fucking chance do you have of trying to support it?

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Dates and Their Problems

I am not talking about going out with people and finding out the woman you are with is 2 straws short of a haystack. And c’mon women…you just KNOW it is the woman who is generally fucking batshit crazy after being on a date. You don’t realize the man’s problems much further down the track.

But this is a little more nerdier and mathematical.
We had the scare for Y2K. After reading about it, I thought it sounded like something straight out a scientologists’ handbook. We all did the test as soon as it came out and forwarded the clocks ahead in Windows and the BIOS to reboot and find nothing was wrong. Not to sound cynical, but did I ever suspect there was ever a REAL problem? Fuck no. It’s OK people, you can take the packets of dehydrated food and tins of baked beans back.
But, I found some dates causing problems elsewhere:
PS3s had problems once it hit 2010

“We are aware that the internal clock functionality in the PS3 units other than the slim model, recognized the year 2010 as a leap year. Having the internal clock date change from February 29 to March 1 (both GMT), we have verified that the symptoms are now resolved and that users are able to use their PS3 normally.”

Even A F22 Raptor was effected by dates and timezones when it crossed international date lines.
So, we made it through Y2K. Phew. I mean, Microsoft are Ensuring time zone issues never occur within Windows. But there is another problem on the horizon: the Year 2038 Problem. I didn’t know such a thing existed until today.

None of this shit matters anyway because, We’re all gunna die in 2012 anyway. Pat, I found a site you can post some flaming comments and just watch the reactions. I just hope that the apocalypse doesn’t wipe out my site and my NAS. I want something to watch when I am dead. And don’t worry guys, I will either come back from the dead and update the site or just update it from 6 feet under.

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Hard Drives

I own a few hard drives.
They came out with SSD (Solid State Drive) which revolutionised the speed at which we get data off a drive. The only problem is they are expensive as children. And there are yet to be any drives with substancial space. 64GB does not cut it. I trip over 64GB of data in a month download from the Internet. Linux distros, porn, homebrew games. AH, WHO AM I KIDDING? It’s porn! ALL PORN!!!

We’ve had platter drives for years. Cheap as shit. But slow.
Nothing new there. But now, I found a bridge between the gap:
Seagate Momentus XT!


They sell them here if this is the sort of thing that interests you. And not only within a reasonable amount of space BUT a reasonable price, too. I mean, it is still 2 x the price than a regular platter drive with 3 x the space. But, look at them speeds.
I’ve got a boner.

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