2 Inches Of Fury

Something Worth Reading.

TV Shows Cop 2 Inches Part 2

So my first attempt at shitting on TV was at best mediocre.

But c’mon people…seriously. You all need to get better tastes in TV shows, stat.
I find one TV show that is actually worth watching lately, it lasts 7 episodes and then it goes on FUCKING hiatus. I would give my left nut for the show to continue with a new season with twice as many episodes. Each episode I hung out for going, “Ooooooo, what are they going to do THIS episode?”.
There is something fuckin really dead set backward about this planet. How does Michael and Michael have issues only last 7 episodes and yet, Hope and Faith, King of Queens or 8 Rules on Boning my Daughter (or whatever it was called that had that hot chick and Peggy Bundy in it - and fuck you arse clowns, I don’t care what you say she is still ridiculously hot for older woman) still manages AT LEAST 5 FUCKING LAUGH-LESS seasons. Sure, Stella wasn’t that crash hot but Michael and Michael Have Issues is much better.

Then you browse something like TV.com or TVRage.com and you get a pool of dicks who believe their opinion matters when it’s like this:
“The latest episode of Prison Break is better than the latest episode of Heroes”
“Nuh-uh.”
“Yes way.”
“No way.”
“Yes way.”
Here’s the thing, you’re both wrong. No one gives a shit about what EITHER of you like or don’t like. None of you said how great the show, “I’m With Busey” or “MXC” was. Instead you are the majority that likes whatever one else likes. Way to voice your opinion of mediocrity and to be apart of the herd. That works for some people but the reviews you give are more generic than the cliche-ridden dialog of your favourite TV shows. And while some clowns go, “Well there’s a reason why it’s so popular…” I’d like to hear one because after watching enough of this shit, it’s really the best of a bad bunch. In Australia, we’re flogged second and third rate American TV shows all the time.

NCIS: Los Angeles has promise. Yeah, it promises to suck the shit right out of my arsehole.
I figure when your stereotypical black cop is LL Cool J, you’re either running out of black guys who could play a good misunderstood or corrupt cop with a heart of gold or whatever. A cop with a mysterious past is searching for one person who can help him with his future…or some generic shit like that. The mainstream eats these cop shows up at a fucking ridiculously alarming rate.

But not all is lost. There is a new show with Chevy Chase and the black dude from DerrickComedy (Donald Glover) so it has potential. Not to mention the dudes who did Arrested Development (another good show which ran for the perfect amount of time but still felt too short) did this show too.
And The Cleveland Show aired last week which should be available for free downloads on the many thousands of free torrent websites. Thank you, torrent technology. Maybe one day we will have a type of free downloading (p2p) technology like torrents that doesn’t rape the arse end out of your internet connection. Oh, for the uninitiated, The Cleveland Show is a spin off from Family Guy. A show as wildly popular as Family Guy was bound to have a spin off. Out of all the characters though, Cleveland seems to perhaps one of the last characters I would do a spin off from. The last being Meg. The thing is though, even though I am a skeptic and cynic, this show is not bad. It will probably last a season when it becomes really good right at the very end. And then Fox will cancel the season only to release the DVD and have it sell just as well as any of the Family Guy seasons ever did and then have it re-air many years later when Fox runs low on the many shit 1 season-lasting shows.

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Morons Cop 2 Inches

“Blogs: never has so many people had so little to say to such few people” - Some cracker.
‘Tis true but I try hard to be an exception.

But seriously, people shit me off. And if you’re reading this, here is a small questionnaire to determine whether you’re part of the problem or part of the solution.
1. Do you drive a Holden Commodore?
If you answered, “Yes” to the above question, you probably have a personality deficiency or perhaps you’ve bought a car this big to compensate for your small penis. Or perhaps you just don’t know any better and bought it. Or perhaps you think to be king of the road, you have to own one.

Driving home today through the ICB (Inner City Bypass), the left lane is backed right back and the right lane is free. Why? There are two exits in the left hand lane. At the top of the exits are traffic lights preventing the flow of traffic. Makes sense right? Today saw a typical commodore driver who somehow thought s/he was exempt from the rest of humanity by pulling out of the left lane out in front of me (as the right lane is not only free but is also the correct lane to get me home) back then tried to wedge their way back into the left lane many cars ahead. In doing this, cars wouldn’t budge (and if this person had a fraction of one fucking brain cell in their head it would seem perfectly clear as to why). Then when cars wouldn’t let this person back in, this driver has now also blocked up the right hand lane as well. It took roughly 30 seconds before my tolerance levels had completely depleted due the stresses of a new job and I was honking my horn. Car manufacturers put it there for a reason. I’m just sad that my horn wasn’t louder. Don’t get me wrong, it is already loud but I wish it were louder. And instead of it making some kind of horn sound, it should be replaced with a loud, “MOVE OUT OF THE ROAD, YOU RUDE FUCKS”. Or something to that effect. In New York, beeping a horn would be common place. In Brisbane, most people do not use it. Generally, there is no reason for it. Except right at this point.

As this person was eventually let in, it was clear this was not the only person. The only reason I pointed out this particular person is not only my heavy bias towards Holden drivers but this person fucked it up for other people such as myself who was right behind this car adding time onto my already fucking long car trip. If others have to drive anywhere near the distance I do, it would drive someone to getting out of their car, going up to the driver and continually hit their car with some kind of bat or metal rod. I drove past this fuck head to see that not only did he hold other traffic up because s/he (I still couldn’t make out if it was female or not - one of those “may be a feminine dude or a masculine chick, not sure” deals) thought s/he was above everyone else and exempt from waiting a line to an exit they clearly had to make BUT s/he had the exact same ear piece for Nokia phones as I have (I never use it) and it looked like this person was talking at the same time. So not only were they a dick head but clearly one giant douche.

So, I had this idea. Police should arm the community (who volunteer, obviously) with cameras to catch the sort of moronic behavior out on the streets. You’d catch the type of car and number plate. That would all there would be to it. Anyone caught doing something stupid (like a Holden Commodore driver cutting across three lanes (one of those being right in front of me); a completely different situation) cops a hefty fine. The brilliance of this plan is no car would be marked so anyone could take a photo or capture the behavior on film. It could be then uploaded to the police by the volunteer. The initial infrastructure would be slightly pricey to upload the video (or the volunteer can hand it in to the police station or post office). If this doesn’t take, the police could offer a nominal reward ($200/month) for volunteering to hook your car up. The reward would pay itself off in no time and a lot less fuck heads on the road. You’d fewer people on the road due to morons not having a licence from all the points they lost doing stupid things.

Told you I try to be an exception.

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