10 Banned Baby Names
It’s a sad day in humanity where someone gets a little creative or just makes such a fucking stupid decision with naming their own child that someone else has to step and say, “No, you can’t give your baby that name”.

Some of these aren’t TOO bad like calling your kid Miatt. I mean, I wouldn’t call my kid that but then again, I’m not retarded. More to the point, I prefer traditional names like Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116. Even if I had 12 other children, there is no way I would call my child Bridge, Apple, Sun, Coloured Rain, Boners, Anus, Penisface and Ovnis which sounds like a hybrid been Ovaries and Penis. What happened if this child was born with both? Then you’d look stupid and give away the secret of your child.
Calling your kid Devil is just begging for trouble. And why in the world would you call your kid Smelly Head? How old are you? The parents who decided on that name should be shot in cold blood and then had that child put down too in case stupidity are contagious or hereditary. Sorry, planet is already full of them. We don’t need more.

I think it is a good thing to be creative in doses with the right people. But there is a very big line between good creativity and just shit house ideas. Not everyone can write, “Stairway to Heaven” or “Brown Sugar”. Using that same logic, not everyone can come up with a pleasant creative name that won’t embarrass the shit out of your child and make him/her hate you for the rest of their lives while being tormented for the stupidity your parents bestowed upon you. There are 1000s of traditional names out there you can give your child that none of your friends will think less of you after you name them. So just choose one and don’t get all creative with the spelling because not only will it still make you look stupid but it will just make you look like you can’t spell properly.

What is the point to having a creative name? To be unique? Your kid will have two eyes, ears, arms, legs, kidneys, lungs, one nose, mouth, brain, pancreas, spleen, heart and whatever he needs to become a functional human being. S/He will look, think and feel like the rest of us. And if they don’t, do you think being unique will make their outlook on life any better? Or improve their quality of life? No. They will be looked at with judging eyes where ever they go and be made into an outcast.

The best you could hope for is that he is outstanding at whatever he does so he can succeed in life. Giving the child a misspelt name or a unique name won’t do that. In fact, they will be probably be looked down upon unless they have a great personality that is highly liked by a lot of people.