This is more of a reminder to myself than a long overdue entry.
The Middle is a second-rate Malcolm in the Middle. Except there are some slight differences.
1. You have the daughter. She is exactly like Meg from Family Guy: ugly, no personality and if she did not exist on the show, we would not give a shit. Except Family Guy has no problem in taking the piss on Meg. Who said they could start putting ugly on TV as some form of accepted reflection on society? Don’t the TV execs know that everyone outside of TV land is beautiful?
2. The eldest Son is an average teen. Like I haven’t seen enough of those. Or even care.
3. The youngest Son is like Dewey. Direct rip off. Except there was always this certain loveable uncertainty with Dewey and the child in this family is just weird.
4. The Mum in the Middle has the best intentions. And who really gives a shit? Malcolm’s Mum is the most infuriating woman on the planet but who can blame her with Sons like she has? That makes better TV viewing to see a woman who is always at the end of her teather.
5. The father is the only saving grace (if there ever was one). I like Neil Flynn’s (Janitor from Scrubs) acting style. But again, he is not funny which seems to be the general theme of this TV show. Generic characters doing unfunny things.

I’d watch Gary Unmarried except I fuckin hate Jay Mohr with a double-fisted passion. I just wanna grab a thick log and brew over thoughts of stabbing him, jail-style while turning that thick log into a sharp shank. I have no logic behind this hate but always had this feeling he was school captain and the jock who always got his way. I don’t think I have such an illogical hatred for another person like I do Jay Mohr. I usually have a pretty good reason for disliking someone. It just makes watching Kings Ransom that ever bittersweet.

Accidentally on Purpose would be a great show EXCEPT it’s 30 laughless minutes. The characters are not well-drawn and generic. And the comedy seems like it came from someone who is stuck in a back room somewhere being drastically underpaid but does it anyway as he is balls deep in debt trying to make it as a comic or had a wife who left him and has robbed the poor bastard blind. Are people so faceless themselves that they relate to characters that have no real character? I loved Jenna Elfman in Dhama and Greg. She’s getting on in age but I’d shag the shit right out of her body and into a comatose.

Gossip Girl is shit. Even the threesome they did to get rating back up was brief and unsatisfying. Feel free to make your own sex joke. Sonja has no idea what brief and unsatisfying is. That’s why she married me.

Glee sucks the shit right out of my arsehole through a garden hose.