Move over Viagra, here comes…spider venom!
“Scientists believe a spider could lead to a breakthrough in sexual health after finding a single bite can cause a four-hour erection. According to the report, researchers at the Medical College of Georgia believe the venom of the Brazilian wandering spider could lead to a new cure for erectile dysfunction. Dr Kenia Nunes, a physiologist at the college, said it works in a different way to Viagra. ‘This is good because we know that some patients don’t respond to the conventional therapy. This could be an optional treatment for them,’ she said. Her study, published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, involved experiments using hypertensive rats with severe erectile dysfunction.”

WOO! So you get bitten by this spider which I hope they are able to prescribe it in a different manner when I am ancient and unable to get wood under the weight of my own control. Although, by that stage, I am hoping technology will have improved to the stage of matrix style realism. I just put on a helmet demolition man style and fuck Sandra Bullock in ways that Sylvester Stallone never did and I could not. Throw your flames but I’d get a 4 hour erection if Sandra asked for a piece. I’d give her the whole meal.

What this entry neglected to tell you is there are several stages when you get bitten by this spider. A 4 hour erection is the first step. Then you hallucinate for several hours. Then certain limbs start to become numb while you get the worst cotton mouth of your life. Then you lose your hair. Skin becomes pail and fragile. You piss and shit everywhere. Then die. So for 4 hours of rock hard stamina, it’s hardly worth it.

Edit: And here’s another thought: Spiderman. If he got bitten by the wrong spider, he could have a constant erection.
People will stop asking him for help.
“ARGH! Save me Spid..uh…erm. What the fuck is that? Do you have a boner?”
“Constantly.”
“Ya know, nevermind. I don’t really need saving. Please put me down.”