Every now and again, I have time to kill at work. This is commonly known as lunch.

I COULD be doing much more useful things with my time, but I just wanna mellow out. I would enjoy the lunch break more over a bourbon but I work for a company who do mining and construction. And on site you are not able to have a drop of well…any substance in your system - alcohol, cigarettes or otherwise. So they enforced this rule that what applies onsite applies in the offices. Now if these offices were on site, I would totally agree. But the closest site to us is so far away, I fail to see how these rules apply to us. Now I understand that it is unprofessional to be drunk on the job. Especially since my job involves helping people with computer problems and talking with them over the phone. But 2 drinks? Shuuurely, I’ll be ffffine. Rrrriiiight?

They told us regular drug testing will be happen but not only have I not been drug tested but I have not heard ANYONE in the entire building being tested.
Except for that hot strumpet in legal.
And that wasn’t a drug test.
It was a frisk.
And it wasn’t done by any officials.
Just me.
Pretending to be an official.
And I kinda liked it.

I would test the boundaries except I like my job. And I will bet you my left testicle the day I go out for a drink during lunch time is the day I get called up for a drug test. And every day after that for a fortnight. And they won’t just call me on my direct number in a discrete manner but over the PA so every one can hear that my boss has a ragin alcoholic on his hands. It’d also explain why my job logging really starts slide after lunch. If I kept a nice little hip flask, you’d notice that by the end of the day, I am really just mashing keys. They’re not even words on the screen but rather a fusion of numbers and letters on the screen. But I have a solution to this problem. Just keep letting me do it and hopefully, I will get used to it and perform just as well sober as I do besotted.

Anyway, apart from this outrage, I found another way to kill some time - online games. WOO!
I have listed them from my least favourite to my most favourite:

Shopping Cart Hero
This game gets old quick. But before then it is not a bad game. It’s like playing Golf on PC - I can play it for a whole 20 minutes before losing interest and it doesn’t even matter if you suck at video games.

Jam Legend
This is like Guitar Hero/Rock Band for PS3/Xbox…etc. Except there is no guitar. And it’s not as cool.

Xiao Xiao 4
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This reminds me of the Virtua Cop series. And this would be really awesome if it lasted longer. I would love a 10MB flash version of this with a number of levels. I finished this on hard in 30 minutes on hard which is still probably too long but I my gaming abilities are well…shit.

Split ‘Em Up
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While the name sounds like some fucked up porno, I love the look to this game and initially it seems easy. You think to yourself, “Hmm, this doesn’t seem like a challenge but it is fun to play.” Just wait. You’ll see what I mean.

Downhill Snowboarding
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I love snowboarding games. I really do. And like Tony Hawk Skateboarding games for the Playstation, games like this seem to be easy to get into and hard to master. I can get good scores on this but can not seem to get the outrageous scores they expect to get some medals.

RetroShoot
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The only complaint I have about this is how it handles. The ship you control is runs a little behind and there is no keyboard support. Other than that, this game is awesome and reminds me of an older but better time where the games were simple but just so effective and easy to get into with just enough challenge to not want to put it down until you have mastered the game.

Plain ol’ Old School Tetris - Gameboy Edition
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I know what you’re thinking - Tetris? Are you in crack? Yes I am but that is not the point. It’s one of the oldest and best games and it never gets old unless of course you have mastered it a million times. Then this wouldn’t be at the top of the list. (Or the bottom depending on which way you read this entry). Even if I was that good, I would still play this game. Man I love Tetris. If that is not enough for you, then I have this:

Modern Tetris
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This is pretty cool, too.

Pacman
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I love Pacman just as much as I love Tetris. And man, I love Tetris.